Funny Quotes and Sayings Collection

Funny Quotes Sayings Page 1

Funny Sayings are best way to spread the humor and brighten up everyone's day. Funny sayings helps beat the stress and cheers you up. Here are some of my favorite funny sayings and quotes. Feel free to share them in your conversation and make everyone laugh.


An optimist is someone who falls off the Empire State Building, and after 50 floors says, 'So far so good!'"

Always forgive your enemies - Nothing annoys them so much.

For Sale: Parachute. Only used once, never opened, small stain.

 There are three sides to any argument: your side, my side and the right side.

 I like work.  It fascinates me.  I  sit and look at it for hours.

Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.

A comedian does funny things. A good comedian does things funny. -- Buster Keaton
Why do psychics have to ask for your name?  - Unknown

The word ‘politics’ is made up of the words ‘poli’ meaning ‘many’ in Latin, and ‘tics’ as in ‘bloodsucking creatures’ ---- Unknown

Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the universe together. ---- Unknown

My advice to you is to get married. If you find a good wife, you’ll be happy; if not, you’ll become a philosopher.

Read More Funny Sayings and Life Quotes.